Banks’ Bailout Bonanza

After Hank Paulson opened up the vaults of the national treasury and made it rain on his beleaguered old buddies on Wall Street, he made a big show of restricting them from using the funds for those famously exorbitant retirement packages they like to give each other.

“Now, now, boys,” he told them. “This is the people’s money. It’s not for any of your golden parachutes!”

After some grumbles and long faces, and some talk of not accepting handouts at all, the banks accepted. How big of them! Now we know why they rolled over so easily. It turns out that nobody said anything to them about not using the taxpayer cash for things like takeovers:

And dividend payments for shareholders:

And, my personal favorite, year end bonuses:

Over the past year, investment bankers not only ruined their own firms, they managed to wipe out the entire species of investment banking as an industry. They nearly toppled the global financial system to boot, leading to an emergency infusion of almost a trillion dollars in taxpayers funds (ie: debt to the Chinese). What do they get in return? Their companies have set aside $20 billion ($20 billion!) for bonuses.

Hmmmm. Screw up royally, get rewarded. Sounds like an arrangement  politicians in Washington should understand quite well.

As lawmakers on Capitol Hill trip over themselves on the way to the podium to condemn these practices, I hope someone in the press asks them one basic question: “Um, guys, weren’t you the ones who … you know … wrote the bailout bill?”